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the New Electric World Commentary
Beverage Guide #1

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Searching the world for the finest in drinkable beverages, Chamberlain is proud to recommend the following products that will tantalize your pallete and delight your company

Product: Cherrio
Winery: Sorich
Origin: Liverpool, UK
Description: Oily Surrealistic color. May qualify as a wine product. Red goes down like paint, but white is easier. Served chilled with cracklin's, English style.
 
Product: Lady Blue
Winery: Singsa Bluff
Origin: Iowa
Description: Cheap blue wine from the center of the USA. Great packaging. Discard the contents and display the bottle.
 
Product: Bonglidi
Winery: Curacash
Origin: Iran
Description: Remarkable blended wine from the deserts of Iran. Brutal pallet but she's got a long satin finish on her.
 
Product: Moorma
Winery: Aga
Origin: Patagonia
Description: A cloudy and mystical affair best served warm in a covered flagon. It has the consistancy of saliva and the first gulp will put you in a trance.
 
Product: Poosh
Winery: Niki-Uka
Origin: Madagascar
Description: Fermented melon with a hint of iron, this saffron colored liquor is best served native-style, with a bowl of marrow and chickma.
 
Product: Green Ghost
Winery: Queen St. Mary
Origin: Arizona
Description: Green colored bottle conceals an egg-flavored beverage with a salted whiskey finish.
 
Product: Mount Blanc
Winery: Warmwood
Origin: Salt Lake City
Description: Mormon principal Paul Warmwood produces a traditional Mormon celebration wine. Mount Blanc tastes like leak gravy and is altogether ghastly.
 
Product: Cambigi
Winery: Pipio Elay
Origin: Fiji
Description: Traditional mint dessert from the mother island, now fermented and mixed with steamed muscle juice. Most effective as a remedy for skin spots rather than a cocktail.
 
Product: Hombre Loco
Winery: Pero Susio
Origin: San Juan, Puerto Rico
Description: While the aroma is fetid, the tast will suprise you. Meat overtones harmonize with the underlying corn-based rootstock to form an unusual concoction.
 
Product: Faca Beer
Winery: Cana
Origin: Chad, Africa
Description: Faca Beer is perhaps the poorest quality beverage we have experienced. Its tame dishwater color hides the brutally spicy liquor within. The beverage has been linked to 60 deaths a year since its debut in 1983.